


Library Learning

by sparksflycastiel (Seabrook73)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Not between Cas/Dean, Past Rape/Non-con, but no actual sex in this fic, discussions about sex, just mentions and not explicit, more like pre sex flirting?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-11
Updated: 2015-12-11
Packaged: 2018-05-06 05:04:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5404076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seabrook73/pseuds/sparksflycastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Something about the atmosphere of a library inspires important discussions. Sometimes those discussions have nothing to do with the books on shelves and everything to do with the people browsing the stacks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Library Learning

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [SPN Writing Challenge](http://spnwritingchallenge.tumblr.com/)
> 
> Find me on tumblr at [sparksflycastiel](http://sparksflycastiel.tumblr.com/)

Dean groaned, banging his head against the campus library shelf full of reference books in front of him. “You’re killing me, Cas. How many books do you really need to look at?”

“No one made you come with me, Dean.” Cas gave his partner an exasperated look. “You know I have a religious studies paper due at the end of this week.”

“Yeah, yeah I know.” Dean sighed. “It’s just, you already know everything, how could you possibly need more references?”

“I hardly know everything.”

“Your 4.0 GPA disagrees.” Dean smirked at his blue-eyed counterpart. “Besides, libraries are the  _worst_.” Cas looked affronted at the suggestion. “They’re so boring.” Dean continued.

“Well, that must mean you find me boring because I love libraries.” Cas deadpanned as he continued to sort through the texts in front of him.

“Nah.” Dean moved behind Castiel and slid his arms around his waist, resting his chin on Castiel’s shoulder. “You make things more interesting. Even libraries.”

“Such high praise.” Castiel ignored Dean as his math-tutee-turned-best-friend-turned-something-more softly kissed his neck.

“I can think of a few ways to make libraries even  _more_  interesting.” Dean nipped at Castiel’s ear.

“Dean, this is hardly the place.” Despite his protest, Cas angled his head to allow Dean’s mouth more access to his neck.

“Aw, come on, Cas.” Dean practically purred. “With your eyes and crazy sex-hair, it is  _always_  the place.”

“I don’t have sex-hair, Dean.”

“Sure do, Cas.”

“To have sex-hair, one would actually have to engage in sex.” Cas reasoned.

“Mmm, that can be arranged.” Dean spun Castiel around in his arms, kissing him soundly.

Castiel froze. He stopped responding to Dean’s romantic advances and gulped as he tried to get his brain to function properly again.

“Cas,” Dean pulled away, sensing Castiel’s discomfort, “what’s up? What’s going on?” Dean reached out to cup Castiel’s face against his hand.

Castiel leaned into Dean’s touch on instinct, which Dean took as a green light to continue as he leaned forward, once again searching for Castiel’s lips with his own.

Castiel pushed Dean away. “Dean, no – stop.” Castiel looked at Dean, embarrassed. “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

“Can’t what, Cas?” Dean gave Castiel a worried look.

“I can’t… do that. With you.”

“With me?” Dean sounded vaguely insulted.

“Not with anyone.” Castiel quickly added. “Not after last time. It – uh – it didn’t go well.”

“What do you mean?” Dean stood up straighter, sensing something more than Cas just not being in the mood was going on here. “Wait, do you mean what happened with April?” Something clicked in Dean’s memory. The rumors of Castiel’s short romance with the seemingly innocent and sweet theater major, April Kelly, had spread like wildfire across campus last year. Whispered talk of April dropping her humble angel act the minute she lured Castiel into her web. Gossip about her wanting too much too quickly and making sure she got it by any means necessary – even if it meant slipping Castiel something extra in his drink one night. After she took what wasn’t rightfully hers, Castiel ended things. April took her vengeance by telling anyone who would listen that Castiel was a frigid bastard and a horrible lay, which was just about the worst insult a freshmen boy could be given by a senior girl.

Castiel nodded mutely, indicating that Dean’s deductions about his hesitancy towards sexual intimacy were correct. “Cas, baby, that’s not… you can’t use that experience to judge how it will be every time.” Dean actually looked angry. Not at Castiel, but the thought of what April had done – what she had  _hurt_  – made his blood boil. “What she did… that was  _wrong_ , Cas.”

“I know.” Castiel looked to the ground in shame. “Even so, it felt like something was inherently wrong with me.”

Dean moved into Cas’ space, gently cupping his face with both hands. “Cas,” he said fiercely, “there is  _nothing_  wrong with you, got it?”

Cas’ eyes went wide, taken aback by Dean’s intense response to his words. Dean sounded so sure that Cas almost believed him. He nodded his head in Dean’s hands to show he understood, or at the very least that he understood Dean’s faith in him.

“Good.” Dean seemed somewhat placated by Castiel’s nod of agreement. “Now that that’s settled, I’ve got some more questions.” Dean’s hands moved from Castiel’s face, rocking back on his heels to give Cas some room. “You mean it when you say you never wanna try that part of a relationship again? The physical part? Because if the answer is really yes then I’ll respect that. I’ll wanna be with you just the same.” Dean looked Cas straight in the eye so he knew he meant every word. “But if the answer is only a yes because you’re scared then you gotta give me a chance. Let me show you how it’s supposed to be – when you’re ready.”

Cas worked his bottom lip with his teeth, unsure of how to proceed. “It’s not that I haven’t thought about it. I have.” Cas gave Dean a small smile. “And it is… a good thought.” Cas seemed to give into the worry again as the smile disappeared from his face. “But as soon as it crosses from just a thought into reality, I freeze. It’s like my body doesn’t know how to handle it.” He shook his head, at a loss for words. “I just don’t want to rush into it. Not again.”

Dean reached out to give Cas’ hand a reassuring squeeze. “That’s cool. We can go as slow as you want. You’re in control, Cas. You say stop and we stop.”

Cas gave Dean a disbelieving look. “It’s that easy?”

“It’s that easy.” Dean shrugged, unsure of how to make it any clearer. “I’ll never make you do anything you don’t wanna do, Cas. I just want to be with you. And if you’ll let me I’d like the chance to show you what it’s like when the whole physical relationship thing is done right. When it feels good. For everyone.” Dean looked at Cas softly. “Just you and me because we got a good thing going.”

Cas felt the knot of fear that had settled in his chest loosen slightly. Dean was okay. Dean was good. Dean was safe. This was going to be okay.  _He_  was going to be okay. He trusted Dean.

“Okay.” Castiel said quietly.

Dean’s heart perked up a bit at Castiel’s answer. “Okay?”

“Yes,” Castiel sounded surer of himself this time, “I want to know what it can be like when it is right.” Cas looked at Dean with such faith it made Dean’s breath hitch. “When it is with you.”  

Dean’s face broke out into a grin as he surged forward and crashed his lips against Castiel’s. He moaned his happiness into Castiel’s mouth, begging for more access with his tongue. Castiel happily granted it, content to get lost in Dean’s kisses for a bit. After a few minutes, Dean shifted so he had Cas pressed up against the library reference section wall, his enthusiasm only growing.

“Dean,” Cas muttered against Dean’s lips.

“Yeah, Cas?” Dean answered breathlessly.

“I was not suggesting we do it right here and now on the main floor of the campus library.”

“Huh? What – oh.” Dean realized where he was and how his body was pressed up against Castiel’s and quickly pulled away. “Uh, sorry.” Dean blushed an attractive shade of red. “I didn’t mean to – just got lost in the moment. My bad.”

Cas laughed lightly at how bashful Dean looked. “There are lots of things we can do to lead up to the main event.” Cas gave Dean a knowing look.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yes,” Castiel bravely slid his hands up Dean’s chest, teasing one of his nipples under the fabric of Dean’s Henley on the way; Dean inhaled sharply. “Maybe not here in the middle of the reference section. I do believe there are some remote stacks on the third floor that hardly anyone bothers looking through anymore.”

“Mr. Novak,” Dean mock gasped. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re trying to seduce me.”

“Hmm,” Castiel hummed teasingly. “Maybe a little.”

Dean grinned, loving Castiel’s playful side. “How about dinner and a movie first?” Dean kissed Cas chastely. “Then we can go back to your place and do… whatever you want to do. No pressure. No expectations.”

“Dinner and a movie?” Castiel gave Dean a curious look.

“Hey, if we’re gonna do this, we’re gonna do it right.” Dean smirked at Cas. “We can work up to the third floor library stacks someday, don’t worry.”

“Ah, so you’re willing to voluntarily return to the library in the future?” Cas smirked.

“What can I say?” Dean smiled fondly at Castiel. “You’re very persuasive.”

“Good.” Castiel turned around to grab the stack of books he was looking at before Dean distracted him. “Then I won’t have to try hard to persuade you to carry these for me.” He dropped the books into Dean’s arms.

Dean was temporarily thrown off balance by the unexpected book drop. By the time he righted himself, Cas was already heading towards the check out counter.

“You coming, Winchester?” Cas called over his shoulder, giving Dean a fond look.

“You’re lucky you’re cute, Novak.” Dean huffed as he followed, warmth filling his chest at the sight of Cas’ smile.

Maybe libraries weren’t so bad.


End file.
